Friday, March 19, 2010

"Is It I?"

I have watched someone I care about just become very humble, submissive, and repentant. He has demonstrated willingness to take all of the responsibility and thus more of the criticism than I believe he deserves, but then I realize that he is an example to me of what I have learned is the only path to true healing. A lesson I learned long ago as I privately dealt with relationship difficulties.

John Bytheway related a principle in his book, When Times Are Tough, which was taught by the disciples when Jesus told them that one of them would betray him. They were all sorrowful and began to quickly ask, “Is it I?” Bytheway said that they could have started to point fingers and accuse someone else, but instead, they were each humbly willing to consider their own possible accountability.

This principle became valuable to me many years ago as I learned information that could have made me feel victimized and revengeful. Instead, because of this great example taught by the disciples, I felt the need to humbly consider, “Is it I?” and then ask myself, “What have I done to contribute to these problems and what can I do to rectify these difficulties?” In so doing, it isn’t about excusing or taking away someone else’s responsibility and guilt, but it is just taking a hard look at myself and focusing on my own responsibility and thus working on my own repentance and improvement.

I have learned that when I blame or accuse someone else and focus on their faults and shortcomings, that I am distracted from seeing the beam in my own eye and thus realizing the need to come unto Christ and having that beam removed by Him. I can’t seek forgiveness for someone else and feel His healing power, and so why would I focus on someone else’s sins. They can only do that for themselves. I am committed to keep my focus on the only person I can control and repent for. Sweet little old me. (Emphasis on sweet, ignore the old!)


Lisa said...

I love this. And I am going to remember it.

Aneisa Phelps said...

You have always seemed to have the right thing to say just when I needed it most. And, you'll NEVER be old in my eyes!

Lara said...

Wow, well said. Thank you Tanya for the insight and much needed reminder.