Monday, May 13, 2013
Mother's Day is a day that I think of the line of maternal Moms who went before me that I had the privilege to know here on earth. My Great Grandmother Leuvenia, my Grandmother Eva, and my Mom, Audrene. These are the women that helped shape who I am. (Blame them, not me) These are the women who taught me the importance of being a mom. They all made sour dough pancakes, homemade ice cream, created a beautiful home, planted gardens, served in their church, knitted and crocheted, exercised, and devoted their lives to their children. They created cherished holiday memories and made family connection and togetherness their highest priority. They made their homes the best place to be.
Thank you Grandma Leuvenia for the fun memory of crocheting nose warmers with you. Thank you Grandma Eva for your example of exercising every day with Jack Lalanne. Thank you for coming and taking care of us that month while my Dad was in the hospital before he died. Thank you for coming to see me when I didn't make it to come see you on Mother's Day that one year. You didn't complain that I was the only grandchild that didn't come, you just came to my home to see me later on in the week teaching me that it isn't about keeping score and just feeling bad that I didn't come, but how much I personally meant for you to come all that way just to see me. Thank you for staying on earth just long enough to meet my first little baby girl a few days before you died.
Thank you to my Mom for the many nights that you prayed by my bed. Thank you for making our home such a fun place to be with lots of fun toys, equipment, and books. (Unfortunately, it was a little too fun and attracted all those messy boys!!) Thank you for all the lessons and opportunities--piano, dance, baton, tennis, swimming, water and snow skiing, painting, sewing. You really gave it your best shot to provide me with an opportunity to find a talent--the failure to do so is mine not yours.
Thank you for taking me golfing so I could catch butterflies. Thank you for having us help make Christmas candy, put stamps in those books, and serving us every kind of food. Thank you for hiding those large chocolate bars from Dad that I would sometimes find. Thank you for the new clothes I would find on my bed when I came home from school after you had been shopping. Thank you for all the shopping trips to Salt Lake and Ogden together. I am a real pro at it now. Thank you for the free haircuts. I'm sorry about my ingratitude at the time because I really thought that if you didn't always cut it so short I would have long, lusciously thick hair. I know better now.
Mostly I want to thank my Mom for provided the perfect environment for me to prepare for and learn the important lessons I have had to learn. Thank you for being a wonderful grandma to my children and making sure that we have had traditions and outings to keep us all close. And thank you for those times that you didn't give us money because it did help us find a way we could do it on our own. You have been the perfect Mom for me.
Lastly, a thank you to my daughter, Courtney, who is carrying on the tradition of her grandmothers. Just today I ran into her at the gardening store buying plants for her garden with her three little boys. She is just as devoted to being a mom as all those before her were.
Posted by Tanya at 2:39 PM
Wednesday, May 1, 2013
But then I woke up yesterday morning with this thought that I might regret not participating in that celebration. It isn't a matter that I can only have one or the other. I can enjoy the experience all along the way AND enjoy the celebration at the end. I have to think that I can use my past regret to teach me to listen to that little voice that says that I might regret not putting on that cap and gown and getting my diploma. Today I will live in a way that I won't regret. I can learn from regret but I can also learn to enjoy the moment so I have less regret to learn from.
Posted by Tanya at 9:34 AM