Powerful Words

There are things that I say to myself that energize me and there are things that I say that block me. Even just saying or thinking that I am frustrated makes me feel even more frustrated. The same with berating myself for being undisciplined. It doesn't make me want to be better, in fact, it supports an unhealthy belief that keeps me doing exactly what I am doing to make my beliefs and my words true.

Instead of saying I am undisciplined or saying that I failed again, I will say I am learning and growing. I really know that each mistake or set back is just another opportunity to learn and do better. It is not what I am. I am capable of more and that belief will propel me.

I can do hard things

I come to realize weird things about myself all the time. I realize that I can do hard things, in fact, I think I actually like to do hard things. Take my statistics class for example. I love it. It has been stressful trying to figure out the online statistics program that I have to do assignments on but then realize how good it feels when I can achieve something that is hard for me.

With all of this said, I also realize that I need to be careful that I don't want to do hard things enough so that I will subconsciously create something hard so that I can in fact do hard things. I do want to set goals for myself that will be hard but I don't want to have events in my life that will be hard just because I am bored and need a challenge. I will consciously create proactive challenges instead of allowing difficulties to come that I have to react in order to fill that need to do hard things.

Benefit of Pinterest

I've discovered a great benefit to Pinterest. It is a lot like window shopping. I get to enjoy looking at things without having to purchase or even actually do it. I love looking at the ideas thinking what a great idea it is and then move on feeling as though I have experienced it for myself. Of course there will be some things I might actually want to do, but honestly I can feel like I have already received enough enjoyment out of it. I even might just print the pictures of great ideas and put the picture on the table the next time I host a party to show what I could have done. I even wonder if I can gain weight just looking at the dessert ideas.

It is the Little Things

Greater awareness opens the door to seeing all the joy in the little things.
The great feeling after unloading at the D.I.
The sense of contentment realizing I can see something really cool in a store and know I don't have to own it, dust it, store it, and later take it to the D.I.
Grandkids who get so excited and run and hug me when they see me. (wait, that is in the category of a big thing)
Sliding in between newly washed sheets.
Figuring out how to work a statistics program in school.
Running up the stairs and just being grateful I can.
Feeling utter peace as I stop and take a deep cleansing breath.
Opening the refrigerator and realizing there is a container from a restaurant to eat for lunch. (I actually eat what is inside the container and not the container, in case you're wondering)
Driving up my street with a gorgeous view of the majestic mountains.
Working in the kitchen and catching a glimpse of a breathtaking sunset.
Having a scripture or a thought randomly show up just when I need it and just knowing things in my life are orchestrated for my good if I take time to notice.
Realizing that the things I learn in school are just what I needed to know.
Getting a little message in my head that tells me to bite my tongue. (Once again, a big thing for those who know me!)
Having a cute little gratitude app on my phone where I can write something I am grateful for and add a picture.
Another deep cleansing breath knowing I am on the right track being more aware and more grateful.

I've Been Tricked

I finally get it. I've been tricked into thinking that buying or having more stuff means I have arrived. Even having too much food in the refrigerator can be almost as difficult as having too little. Goldilocks had it figured out. The fable really isn't about breaking and entering, it is about a healthy place in the middle--not too hot or too cold, not too hard or too soft, not too little or too big, It is finding "just right."

Balancing the Star

I love this thought, which also means I love Pinterest. Anyway, these are the perfect questions to ask to balance the star. It includes the spiritual, physical, mental, emotional, and social part of me. I especially love thinking of the emotional as being about passion and creativity.

Couch Jumping

Tom Cruise must have had a Grandparent's house like ours and that is why when he felt joy, he was jumping on Oprah's couch. Our grandkids jump on our couches. If you haven't been to our home, let me describe it. We have a long couch on one side of the room and then another one on the other side. In between the two couches are two upholster ottomans and sometimes I even have my mini tramp in between those so our grandkids jump from one couch to the ottoman, then bounce on the mini tramp, onto the other ottoman and ending on the other couch. Our family room is a tumbling gym, and the kids love it and I love that they love it. I have fond memories of going to my grandparents house and with my cousins, taking the furniture and turning it sideways to create a tent in the corner. I love that our home is not so pristine that they can't have such a great time. Of course, when the two 3-year olds were playing and climbing on the piano in the living room, we put a stop to that. Even at grandmas house, there are limits.

Awareness

My New Year's Resolution creates an awareness for that which brings me joy that a focus on the external goals never adequately did. By removing the tedious and exhausting list of resolves on how to improve my new year, I am freed to notice how really wonderful life can be, especially in the little things. In essence, I am finding that my New Year's Resolution is really about discovering a new awareness that energizes my inner being and that ultimately translates into greater purpose in what I choose to do. Simply stated, my feelings of inner joy creates a stronger desire to continue to do more that brings me joy. It really is the inside-outside approach that I have always believed in but now my heart is falling in line with my head. No wonder we get to live forever, it is going to take me that long to figure this all out. Isn't it great that we get to learn from our experience even if I am on the remedial track.

No Sitting on the Sidelines

The other night I went ice skating with the young women in our church. My first inclination was to sit on the side lines and watch them have fun. That was what I did when I helped drive my granddaughter and her friends to go ice skating for her birthday a couple of months ago. I just sat and watched and kept thinking I should join the fun, but I didn't

This time I resisted holding myself back and worrying about getting hurt; and although I had to skate the first lap hanging on the wall, I finally got a little braver and actually glided out with the big kids. Life is to be lived not watched. I loved that little bit of courage that I felt stepping out of my comfort zone.

Enjoying Relationships

A big part of making the most of each day is taking the time to enjoy my relationships. Time invested in relationships doesn't have to have physical evidence to prove my productivity or accomplishment. It is a non-tangible pursuit; and in a world that seems to want a product to prove our success, it is easy to be deceived into wanting to put my time into more visible endeavors. I don't want to ever think that I have to have something to prove my accomplishment for the day. That is why my new year's resolution is so great. I can feel success having spent a day doing something such as connecting with people that makes me feel good. My success isn't showy.

One Resolution

Seriously. My one and only New Year's Resolution is working beautifully. Living life to the fullest every day is much more effortless, and I am even more productive but also really enjoying the accomplishments. Focusing on how I feel and doing what I enjoy instead of what I want to or have to accomplish is much more peaceful and energizing. I have discovered that I really do enjoy hard and busy work but I am giving myself permission to enjoy the process and the feeling at the moment instead of just banking on feeling good when it is finished. I probably use to get more of a charge out of checking it off the list but now I feel good in the actual performance. Love it. Love life.

Less is More

I realize that I have bought into a dysfunctional American dream that to have more and more is better. I haven't been dejunking but actually purging things from my home, and I discovered that less really is more. Take recipes and cooking for example. Clearing out the old recipes books and having less recipes to choose from has been a great motivator to cook more. Weird. I always thought the more choices I had the more motivated I would be. Not so. I am going to continue to purge because of how liberating and motivating it is. Warning to my family--make sure you are useful or out you go!

The Center of My Life

Enough said.

Increased Lung Capacity

Since I have been swimming, my lung capacity has increased and now I can run faster and longer with less effort. The other benefit is that when I am not exercising, my breaths are longer, deeper, and more relaxing.

It is the same in all areas of my life. The more I am stretched spiritually, mentally, emotionally, and socially, the greater my capacity, and the easier it is dealing with all that life throws at me.

No Excuses!

I am going to repeat a saying I keep having to remind myself of. "No matter how valid the excuse, it doesn't change performance."

The theme for this season's Biggest Loser is "No More Excuses." I also happened to catch a program the other night on educational TV in which Wayne Dyer was speaking about "Excuses Begone." Seems like someone is trying to tell me something.

Just like in physical health, the excuses for not being healthy are not going to change the fact that we will have health problems. Excuses don't change performance and they won't change the negative consequences we suffer from.

I am not going to focus on excuses, and I am not going to enable others by feeding into their excuses. I am really clear about the fact that the excuses keep me from focusing on my responsibility and enabling others to dodge their responsibility, and ultimately could keep me from the need to repent and rely on the Atonement to overcome and improve and deny others that same opportunity.

Excuses are really a way to keep me from drawing close to my Savior. So when we say the devil made me do it, we really are saying the devil wants us to make excuses. In keeping with my new year's resolution to enjoy everyday and make it the best it can be, I am keenly aware how much better I feel when I give up excuses and improve and allow others to also.

Train Wreck

Tonight I had to do some mindless work and so I thought I would watch a little TV while I did it. What I happened to turn on was the show Toddlers and Tiaras. Yes, just like a train wreak, I couldn't turn away. It is a show I had only seen previews of and swore I would never actually watch. I am just wondering why family social services isn't right there ready to arrest those mothers. Of course, I guess I am no better for having watched it going back and forth from amusement watching the Moms to sadness knowing the kind of affect that could have on those poor girls. After two episodes of that, Taylee and I continued watching "quality" TV with an episode of Hoarders. I am now going to bed feeling sorry for people and their circumstances but can't lie, I am feeling pretty good about my psychological condition and homemaking skills. I just hope I don't have to watch those shows every week to keep bolstering my self esteem.

Joy for Just a Moment

I really get that there is joy that can seem great in the moment but that isn't really satisfying for very long. In fact, some of that temporary joy can turn into pain. I am getting better at recognizing the joy in the moment that creates lasting benefits, and that is the kind of joy I am seeking every day.

Swimming and loving it!

This morning I headed off to the pool and discovered that everyone else was starting the year off determined to exercise. But that wasn't my intent. I was there because swimming makes me happy, and I am keeping my one resolution.

So, according to my new resolution; I wanted to start my day doing something that makes me feel great and the whole hour that I swam, I thought about what it is I love about swimming. First off, I love that I have a stylish swim cap that matches my swim suit (as stylish as I can get looking like a cone head). Even with swim wear I have to be matchy matchy (sorry Stacy) and that gives me a little thrill (yes, dull life).

I don't know the physic's explanation of what happens to my body when I am in water, but my stomach just sucks in like no other. Call me shallow, but it is a great feeling to feel that skinny, and this benefit is more noticeable since we just got the photos from my daughter's wedding and I forgot to suck in. Not a pretty sight. I should live in water or at least have all pictures taken in water.

The other thing is that with my ears under water, there is no sound and I am enveloped in a quiet hollowness that allows me to think deeply. Trust me, it is not that I am having profound epiphanies, but it is a quiet solitude that I feel in no other setting. It is awesome.

I also love how swimming forces me to breathe deeply and in a steady rhythm, in which I never feel out of breath. I also love that I walk away only smelling like chlorine and not a dirty gym. Lastly, I walk away feeling so physically incredible, and emotionally satisfied knowing that for that hour, I kept my resolution and had a great time.

A Relaxed New Year!

This year I have one resolution. This year is going to be the best year ever. No more specific resolutions that get me focused on anything but truly enjoying my life. I know that I have gotten to the point that I know what brings me peace and joy and what doesn't (oh to be old and wise), and I will choose to do what makes me happy. This also means that I can even feel joy and peace doing all the things that I have to do that I didn't use to think would make me happy because enjoyment is always a choice. I can make every moment the best and that is what I make for my only resolution. Simple enough. Just saying that makes my whole body relax.