Hijacked Sense of Humor

I have multiply personalities. Call me Sybil or Martha or Gertrude...

I love intellectually deep discussions and sometimes I can get too analytical and take life way too seriously. SURPRISE! Okay, that is not a surprise to all of those who have had to endure my droning on and on and...

I also love to laugh and have a good time. Sometimes I have got to drown the personality that wants to figure life out and embrace the personality that likes to laugh and just enjoy life.

Sometimes life can get pretty heavy, especially dealing with crazy people (myself included). So right now I just take a deep breath and laugh. Thank goodness I still have a chance to pay off the terrorists that hijacked my sense of humor. I am giving them my oldest child. (Sorry Jake, it's been nice). 

A Mother's Prayer

There is simply no more important prayer than the one in which a mother is pleading for the health and happiness of her children. Watch out world. When a mother prays, miracles will happen.

Importance of Community

I was just reading in the book Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell. He tells the story of a town in Pennsylvania in the 1950s that had no heart disease and in which all the people lived to old age. Even though they had the same bad habits as other people, they didn't suffer the same bad health.

After extensive study of people in this town, it was concluded that the factor that made the difference was their sense of community.

I was also reading an article by Elizabeth Vandenberghe https://www.lds.org/ensign/1994/10/religion-and-the-abundant-life?lang=eng&query=religion about the research she has done on the value of religiosity. Incidentally, years ago I heard her speak and she was a major catalyst for my return to the university and a desire to do research.

What a great blessing it is for me to be part of a family and a religious community in which I am a member, I have shared emotional connection, my needs are integrated and fulfilled, I can have influence and am influenced by, and I get to have responsibilities. It is nice to know that these factors will have more of an influence on my health and happiness than my bad eating habits. Yea for chocolate! 

Trials and disappointment

Trials and disappointment can suck our faith and sense of humor right out of us.  I know two of my greatest gifts are my faith and my sense of humor. One, of course, light years more important than the other.

But... And I have said this a hundred million times, it is those very trials and disappointments that are my greatest test. I will fail if I don't hold unto both my faith and my sense of humor and especially if I become angry and bitter even if it is just towards those who are practicing insanity (keep doing the same thing and expecting different results. And please know that I am oftentimes in that same sorority. I have often acted insane).

I will only learn from my experience and draw closer to my Heavenly Father if I let those tests refine me and strengthen my need for His strength and direction. My experiences with insanity help me see my need to make course corrections. So to all those trials and disappointments, I say "thank you!" Thank you for helping me increase my faith.  Now if I can just find my sense of humor.....

Choose Mercy not Bitterness

The last two days my scriptures have fallen open to verses about mercy. Having recently experienced people who have fallen into deep bitterness for injustices,  I have seen the damaging affects of choosing bitterness over mercy.

I love the definition of mercy. "That benevolence, mildness, or tenderness of heart which disposes a person to overlook injuries, or to treat an offender better than he deserves."

It is the natural woman in me to become bitter, angry, and seek revenge for someone who I feel has injured me. Another randomly discovered verse in scriptures yesterday helped me want to soften my heart. It talks about people who have a desire for happiness and people who have a desire for evil. As I look around me, I realize most people are just trying to find happiness and not necessarily want to be evil. Very few people are intentionally seeking to be evil.

We all make wrong choices thinking at the moment it will make us happy. That doesn't make us evil; just human. We all need to experience mercy. Bitterness makes it worse. I am grateful to be able to see the negative affects of bitterness. It helps motivate me to choose a different way. To choose mercy.

Make a Difference not Just Eat, Drink, and be Merry

It seems like our world is moving into an era where it is all about selfies and self improvement.  I even started this blog as a quest for self improvement but along the way I have realized that the ultimate goal is to make this world a better place. Yes, we start to make it a better place by trying to be a better person but that is just the means to a more purposeful end and is also the result of what is most important. What is most important is to live a life of service and trying to make a positive difference. To leave this world better than we found it.

I am grateful to be part of a church where we are taught to serve and lift others in addition to what we do for our families. We are indeed given church callings in which we are given the opportunity to serve. We don't just come to church to be fed but we also get to feed. What starts out as an expectation becomes a real blessing. It is amazing how good it feels to be an important part in the life of another who is at first "an assignment" but later becomes a friend who is incredibly grateful for the impact they say I have had on their life (What kind of impact, you say? Well I am glad to be an example of what not to do, if nothing else).

This picture on the beach of a footprint is mine. I know that I have a unique footprint to leave. We all do. This life isn't just about eating, drinking, and being merry. Yes, we can and should be joyful and happy and have fun, but the most important part is serving and making a difference, especially without financial reward.

I have certainly had a lot of fun serving in my church callings and other places I have volunteered (well, let's face it, been asked to participate. I am not saintly enough to actually volunteer) because church isn't the only place to offer service.  I have made some of my best friends while serving in church and other organizations. And there is no greater reward than a note like the one I received today from a grown up young woman that I was able to serve and who served me so richly as well. "I love YOU! I also think of you almost daily as I do the many things I do as a wife and mom and try to serve the Lord!"

I am grateful to have opportunities that force me to be less selfish. I hope that I can always make a difference. "Make you mark" was the theme of the year I served as PTA President in my children's elementary school and I intend to make that my theme for a lifetime.

Seeing the Glass Half Full

I love this thought that I heard years ago. Learning to see the best in people and the best in circumstances is incredibly important. Growing up with a loving and wonderful but perfectionist and oftentimes critical father, I was kind of programmed to see what is wrong. That ability was oftentimes helpful when I coached or taught someone something. I could see what was wrong and help them correct it. It has also benefited my desire for self improvement because I can clearly see my own faults and repent and work on changing it.

But...it is a focus on the negative and what I tend to focus on builds. I remember something I read years ago about how just like telling someone they are fat doesn't help them become thin, pointing out the negative doesn't actually inspire anyone to become better. It is looking for the best in people that ultimately leaves them better than I found them.

It is also especially beneficial to understand and forgive people for their short comings. In that way it gives me a lot of confidence that they will be more understanding of me and overlook my faults.