Enjoy the Moment

I have realized that I have lived so much of my life thinking about the past and what I wish I would have done differently or anticipating the future in either worrying about it or falsely thinking I will be so much better then. I have become more aware of is how much tenseness I experience in the present because I am too hung up on being perfect either looking back or forward. I often don't enjoy the moment because I keep thinking of what I SHOULD be doing and not what I AM doing. What I now know is that peace and joy resides in the present moment and the better I get in relishing and enjoying what I am doing and experiencing right now and seeing the moment as perfect just the way it is, is what will make me more relaxed and happy.

What really made me realize what a bad habit I have created in my perfectionistic state of dissatisfaction with the past is what I experience with my daughter's wedding day. As any mother of the bride can confirm, there is a lot of planning and preparation that goes into that big day trying so hard to make it perfect. At the end of the actual wedding day, I really could joyfully say that it was a perfect day and I enjoyed every minute of it. Several days later, I felt myself get into that bad habit of dwelling on the past glorious event in that regretful, dissatisfied way. I knew that at the moment I had already claimed it was perfect so why would I have a need to create regret? I immediately knew that it was because of that bad habit that I spent years cultivating.

My new commitment is to love and enjoy each moment more fully. I can still enjoy the memories from the past and anticipate wonderful memories in the future but I will only look back with gratitude and look forward with hope. I truly have so much good in my life and I will be more focused on celebrating the good. Every moment can be perfect if I choose to see it that way.